One Good Choice Begets Another

This summer is seeing a lot of changes for one Dr. Mercutiburrs. Starting this blog a total of like 7 hours ago made me realize that. After posting my little blurb on the oil spill, I could not get back to sleep. I've now been awake 10 hours. I went to bed early with the hope of rising renewed and ready to hit the job market. That did not happen. My hag called me at midnight which is apparently what woke me up. I didn't figure that out until 2 am when I actually checked my phone. It was sort of a hot mess. So I blogged, and surfed, and updated songs on Playlist.com. And then at 5:30 when I realized I wasn't going back to sleep, I got up, stretched, and went for a run. Unfortunately, a mile into it I started having an asthma attack. I slowed the pace on the way home, jogging off and on. Then I had to wake my family because I accidentally locked myself out.

I'm just kind of being surprised by all the little changes in my life: the will to actually go for a run, blogging, perseverance in my pursuit of a job. I've just graduated high school. The world is a forest laid out before me to blaze a trail or follow a beaten path. What was the point of this post? I don't remember. Mostly to curb my boredom. there are brawny men in khaki shorts mowing my lawn.
I find myself wondering if anyone is ever going to see this. Why am I writing it? Why am I making it public? Who knows...

I'm wearing my paper Mario pajamas that my friend Sami got me for Christmas. Not long after I received them, I ripped them wrestling with another friend, Justin. So I've barely worn them since then. I like them though. They're soft and breathable. And all the little paper Marios are really cute. God, I'm gay. Flame on..

My legs are really sore. I went on another run two days ago with my sister Laura. 2 miles. Nothing too difficult. The funny thing is, my stamina is just fine, but my legs are killing me. I'm just plain out of shape. How does Mario manage to keep his quaint, portly shape if he's running and jumping on goombas all the time? It must be all those mushrooms he eats.

I'd like a boyfriend. I hate that I'm talking about this, but I'm trying this thing where I don't censor myself just cause someone might not like it. I've enjoyed it so far. I've managed to piss a few people off, but I feel self-affirmed. Anyway, my first and last relationship (last in the sense that it was my most recent relationship, not that I intend to become a monk)ended after 2 1/2 months in mid March. He was 14, I 17, it was a mutual breakup. We just weren't very compatible. We had a great time, but when we finally got to really know each other, we just didn't fit. I think the reason it even started in the first place was because we're in BibleBelt, USA, and central Kansas just isn't too homo-friendly.
I find myself missing him. But as my closest friends have articulated, I'm probably not really missing him, I'm missing my boyfriend. I'm missing the benefits of just having someone there to make you feel special and to give your affection. I'm super lonely though. And he's found someone already. I suppose "already" is a poor choice. It's been 3 months almost. Good for him, though. God, I'm just so jealous.
I just really want someone. And that's probably not going to happen very soon. I'll be leaving town for college in 2 months, and even if I weren't there's no one here that I'm interested in. Except Aaron. But he's going away too. And he's not interested in me.
I'm going to camp next week and I'm really hoping there's a new family there with a cute, sexually curious son for me to get to know. I just want a fun, week-long fling. I had a rebound back in March, but it was a suck-ass rebound. The guy was gross. We got along pretty well up until this one date. It was super awkward, and for some reason we had nothing to talk about. Then we kissed and I felt like I never wanted to touch another boy in my life.

I started this post cause I felt like I was becoming such a suburbanite. I've started blogging, I went running this morning, I had an unusually healthy breakfast, and then I settled down to watch Regis(who was fortunately replaced by Kelly Rippa's attractive husband) & Kelly and The Desperate Housewives. Like, I've just been doing so many things that are out of character for me. It's sort of liberating.
Hahaha, no one cares a single bit about any of this. I hope some poor sap reads this whole thing and then realizes he's just wasted 10 minutes of his life. If it's even that long.
I definitely feel that all these changes are going somewhere good. Like they're leading up to some sort of metamorphosis that will leave me armed and ready to take on the world. Wouldn't that be something.

AMAGAH, it's a blog..

So...I'm starting a blog. because this guy on Omegle.com told me too. He observed that i like to rant a lot, which I do, and that I have a lot of opinions, which I kind of do, and he said that blogging would be good for me. So yeah. Starting a blog...

Right now, the thing that has piqued my interest is this oil spill business going on in the Gulf of Mexico. What I understand is that, (somehow)an oil pump broke and for 51 days has been pumping oil into the Gulf.

I've been paying cursory attention to the catastrophe through AC360 and The Colbert Report, because I'm white and politically conscious.
It just has me sort of dismayed, because this planet is pretty much broken beyond all repair. NAME THAT MUSICAL!! Seriously, if you can name the musical that lyric is from...well I can't give you anything substantial, but I'll mention you in a post on this blog that people will totally read and be like "Dude! That chick jessica544 is so cool!"

Anyhow, I've just been sort of saddened by this whole mess. Unfortunately, I can't feel anything too deeply because I live in Kansas and am not really feeling any of the affects of the oil spill here in the midwest. However, my heart goes out to those people whose careers and lifestyles are in jeopardy. If this is you, I'm sacrificing lambs to all the gods I can think of in hopes that their blood will save your jobs...so yeah.
This is probably coming from my lack of investment in the subject, but I don't really get where all this hostility for BP is coming from. I mean yeah, it's their pump and they should take responsibility for allowing thousands of gallons of oil to gush into the Gulf, threatening careers and entire ecosystems alike, but it seems like they've done that for the most part. Yeah, they're being kinda sleezy by buying the first spot on Google for the search "oil spill," but I can't really judge them. I mean if it was I, I'd be scrambling to preserve my image in the publics eye. But then I thrive on others' opinions of me, and I kind of die inside when people don't like me.

In any case, I certainly intend to become more educated on the subject, which shouldn't be too difficult since one incredibly handsome newscaster happens to be covering it, as well as another, slightly less handsome, but certainly more funny one.

This has been my attempt at blogging. Tata.